- Mood: confused and agitated
- Weather: overcast 74 degrees
So I'm all healed from my surgery and pretty much back to normal, just dealing with the scars, putting Vitamin E oil on them every day so they disappear quickly and nicely.
I trained for 2 days with my new job at the acupuncturist and on the 3rd day she asked me to be the 'model' for her new brochures, and padi me $60 for like 20 mins for it !
Cool.
SP has been a little strange... all these years I have whined that I want and need more affection from him, and he ignored me, or it lasted 2 days then when back to nothing... now every day he says he loves me, sometimes 3 or 4 times, that is UNHEARD of !! 
At the weekend, he said it when we were about to go to sleep, and I didn't say it back (I don't always, not unless I really mean it in that moment) and he asked if I was still happy with him...??!!
I said of course, where did that come from (he NEVER asks questions like that, which make him seem insecure). He said that sometimes he needs to hear it too.
It's just weird that he is like this all the time now, from virtually ignoring me and being very unloving, to almost stifling me with kisses and hugs and words of love. Then LAST night, he cuddled me and said "I love you, I'm lucky to have you "
Uhh.... you JUST realised that?? LOL
Oh and on the wedding anniversary card he gave me he put that he is lucky to have found me and loves me more and more each passing day. Holy fuck. Those words have NEVER come out of his mouth. WHAT is going on??
Has he:
- finally realised what a great partner he really has?
- feeling insecure coz he 'found out' that me and Rob are in contact outside of his 'knowledge'?
- upto something of his own? (ie. cheating)
I hope it is one or both of the first two. Maybe I should sneak a peek in his journal and see if I can find any clues there.
Or is it because I have a book "deal beakers, find out if your relationship is worth saving or it's time to move on" on the bedside shelf?
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